Confiscated items deemed to begin warfare
Everything is a weapon. It can become a sword. A gun. An electric force field. A special vapor shield that protects from bad guys. Everyday items morph into weapons before our eyes, alongside the plastic and styrofoam versions. In our home, we are constantly looking for tape or the swiffer--because we have either hid them-or they are out of . . .
Swimming is a big thing in our community. Kids begin when they are babies, do it
year-round, and strive to make the school swimming club. We also live near a large body of water and swimming is something to do when it’s bitterly cold six months of the year. My children are not like a duck to water. More like, I’m so scared of water, the . . .
Kid art is the best. It provides a window into their world and allows one to glance at the environment through their eyes. We love when their drawings resemble a penis or when they paint anatomically correct details on superheroes. Nipples make us giggle. Double points when they draw mom taller than dad or put all the family members in the . . .
As I FINALLY got around to putting Christmas decorations away, I came across some of my favorite items. Letters to Santa by a little girl and little boy whom I've never met, never seen, and never known.
I found them the summer we moved into our first house. They were buried deep in a hall closet, underneath some worn contact paper, . . .
Nothing Happy About it
One of my children's favorite toys. Of course it is.
And cherish the blanket that goes with him.
Sleeps in his own bed, with multiple lovies--next to the night light-- just in case he gets scared of the dark. Wuss.
He joined us at the dinner table and happily ate some mac n'cheese. He prefers chocolate milk to water. Snot.
He . . .
My New Year's Resolutions
- I will take a yoga or Pilates class and not be a spastic ass. This also means I can't mock the Crossfit classes held outside.
- I will try oil pulling. And remember not to use the sink as a spittoon. Maybe.
- I am going to be the newest blogger for People magazine. Camila Alves showcased holiday kid-friendly recipes--one of which was . . .
...cause inside out is wiggity , wiggity wack
Me: Your underwear is on backwards.
Silas: No, it's not. It feels good.
Me: How does it feel good? That is not possible. Please take it off and put it on the right way.
Silas: No. Don't want to. I like seeing Donatello.
Silas: I can see him. He is checking out my butt.
Silas: See? He is protecting my butt.
. . .